Saturday, April 30, 2011
Is this really necessary?
Thursday, April 28, 2011
I'm afraid something is wrong.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Did I O?
Monday, April 25, 2011
Here it comes!
Just a little lovin' early in the mornin'
I really like owl stuff ^_^
ETD
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Darn - CD 22
Friday, April 22, 2011
I want to be an Easter bunny
At cosmotology school, you are the minority if A) You don't have kids or B) you aren't currently pregnant. I am a minority. Anyway some of the fairly new mom's were talking the other day about how this is their first time being an Easter bunny this year. I'm so envious. I want to be an Easter bunny too :(
Dh and I were going to start bding yesterday but both of our sleeping schedules were off so we didn't get the chance to. But we were able to this morning and plan on doing it again tonight and everyday for probably 6 more days or at least a day or two after I O which could be any day now. My temp dropped super low this morning so hopefully I'm gearing up to O. Please please let this be our month!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
It's been a long time
Smells that don't go together
I'll elaborate more on this later, but the smell of death and bbq is a really gross combination.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Last Minute thoughts
Please, tell me your joking!
So, our internet was down for the last 24 hours. We kept unplugging and reseting things and was on the phone with our internet service provider like a million times. They told us last night that they were experiencing an outage in our area and that is should be fixed by 6am. Well, it wasn't fixed then and by the time I got home from school, it still wasn't fixed. So, we called our ISP's again, and this time I started to get mad - and in return, the tech support guy cussed at me and when my husband mentioned that he had done tech support before the guy said "Good for you, congratulations". Are you fucking serious? Anyway, we ended up on the phone with like 4 different people and no one could fix our shit..and then it dawned on us. My father in law lives behind our house and currently has someone staying with him. Well a week or so ago, he had mentioned to us that his new roommate had done cable installation before and could hook up free cable (Not because he is with a cable company, but had planned on stealing it - illegally.) Anyway, once we realized this could have been the problem DH ran up to his dad's and sure enough that stupid moron had tried to hook up cable and unplugged our shit in the process. OMG I was so pissed off! The guy put our shit back together and we have internet again, finally. I'm just glad that we didn't have the technicians come out to fix it because i'm pretty sure they would have noticed that our stuff had been tampered with. Jeez what the hell is wrong with people? Like I understand the thought of free cable sounds nice and whatever but it's only idk like $30 a month. Plus, stealing cable is super illegally! This guy is way to old to be thinking like he's 15. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
:-\
When I wake up
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Dreams
Friday, April 8, 2011
In the beginning..& baby names
So- It was October '10 and we had been watching John and Kate plus 8 for a couple of weeks. I think watching it was what really got the baby ball rolling. I've wanted kids ever since I can remember. In fact, if I could have gone to school to become a mom- that's what I would have done. I feel like I was born ready. Even when I was a kid and was sort through toys that I didn't want/need anymore - I kept a few bags of things that I wanted to give to my children when I had them. Anyway lol One day dh and I watched a movie called Babies - they basically just filmed the lives of 4 babies in different living situations. One was in Namibia, Mongolia, Japan, and California. I think there were very few words said in the film - it was completely focused on the babies and what they were doing and how they were living. Sometime during the movie - DH brought up us having a baby and we started talking and decided that we were ready to start trying! I stopped taking my bcp that night and we've been trying ever since.
As for baby names that I am fond of at the moment:
*Eivlyn (My favorite)
*Ava
*Bella
*Harvey
*Oliver
*Jude
I'm sure my list will continue to grow throughout this journey. God I cannot wait to become pregnant. Today is CD 7. I should O somewhere around CD 23-26 (As long as this cycle is somewhat similar to my last two.) So let's see that means..about April 22nd-30th we will really concentrate on BD'ing. I hope April is our month!
Thursday, April 7, 2011
One last thing before I go..Win a Vasectomy.
Boy or Girl?
So, I stumbled upon a Chinese Gender Chart on thebump.com. According to this chart, it seems as though I am more than likely going to have a girl. I'm looking forward to see if the chart proves to work for me. At this point, I would be ecstatic just to be pregnant and have a healthy baby! However, if I was able to choose - I'd have a girl. Her name will be Eivlyn. I've been set on that name since I was probably 15 - I've even had dreams about her. Hmm I will blog about my other baby names later :)
When will it end!
I haven't been to school at all this week and the majority of last week I was absent as well. Ah yea I guess I forgot to mention - I'm in cosmetology school. Again. I'm going back for my instructors license, whether or not I'll teach when I get out - who know's? Anyway, I haven't been going because I am in no shape to function outside of my house right now. I told the school that I have mono. I really don't have mono, but it sounds a lot better than saying i'm going through severe withdrawals from anxiety medication. Withdrawing from anxiety medication just isn't really a social thing lol. I do plan on going back to school, starting Monday.
I wish my cycles weren't so long. I'm a bit jealous of the girls who only have like a week in-between af ending and ovulating. I have like 2-3 weeks in-between. It just makes the process so much longer. I'm just so ready to be pregnant! I honestly thought that I would have been pregnant by now, I mean there are so many girls that I see on almost a daily basis that are getting pregnant by accident. It's just ridiculous. Which reminds me, I need to order more IC's - internet cheapie hpt's for you normal people. I buy them in bulk. Yes, I admit - i'm a poas-aholic. I did really well my last cycle, I only took one test! Compared to my usual 5 tests that I take during my 2ww lol. But I blame that partially on DH - dear husband - because he is usually more impatient about testing than I am! I hate testing too early, not so much because of the BFN - big fat negative - but because I hate telling dh that i'm not pregnant yet. It just crushes him every time and that makes me feel bad. Not like there is anything more I can do to aid in the baby making process, but I do sometimes feel like it's my body's fault for not making the baby - Yes, I know that is completely irrational. I have a lot of irrational thoughts - hence my anxiety disorder.
And yes <---- I recommend those.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Allow me to introduce myself..
Hmm I should probably catch you up on the rest of my life as it currently stands. Let's see, I quit my job yesterday and it felt great. I'm a hair stylist. I love doing hair, but I hate working in the wrong environments. My first salon wasn't too bad, taught me the ropes at least. Unfortunately that shop shut down and I was forced to seek work elsewhere. My second shop had potential...keyword: had. The owner was a little...hm - crazy, unclean, and irresponsible. I mean - the lady reused her shampoo caps for crying out loud! Needless to say, that job ended fairly abruptly. And for my last and most recent job- well, it was like a chain salon wannabe. I had an ok amount of walk-ins, but I was only making $5 a cut - and well, that just wasn't cutting it. I was spending more money going to work than I was making. Plus, the inside looked like a cross between a funeral home and a nursing home. It most definitely wasn't living up to it's sporty name. So I quit, with no plan B in mind and I am ok with that. I'm tired of working jobs that make me unhappy so i'm going to step back and carefully plan my next move.
Oh, here's a fun fact - I'm currently withdrawing from an anxiety medication - cold turkey. I've been taking anxiety meds for idk about a year and a half now. Well, my health insurance ran out in September so I quit seeing my psychotherapist or whatever she was. So, my medication ran out and I was also out of refills. Turns out, they wont refill my medication until I come back in for an appointment. And of course, they are booked for like the next two months plus the company that I go through has been extremely rude and unhelpful about the situation. So, i've decided to hell with it and that I am no longer going to take my medication. Well, the withdrawal is totally kicking my ass. I am on day 4 or 5 of not having my meds.Well, i ran out over a week ago and went a few days without it then was given an emergency supply for 4 days, and now i'm off of it again. It's pretty horrible, I feel nauseous most of the time, all I want to do is sleep, my senses are a bit off which tends to cause feelings of panic once in a while, I get bouts of dizziness, and I can go from laughing about absolutely nothing to wanting to cry and tremble all within 2 minutes, my dreams are even being affected. The pharmacy tech told me today that withdrawal symptoms would last 5-7 days...However, everything i've read online from actual people that have actually come off of the same drug have said it's more like 7 weeks...So either way, i'm in for one hellish ride.
One last thing before I go - i'm Buddhist. It's not really something that I state out of the blue, but it's important to know for possible future blogging reasons. I didn't grow up in a church or with any sort of religion for that matter. I did go to church for a period of time in my younger teenage years, but it just didn't feel right - at all. I've always naturally felt like I leaned into Buddhism. I finally started to read more into it recently and it just completely suits me and since then I have taken refuge in the Three Jewels.
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Well, that about sums me up for now. At least, it's a general basis of myself. I'm sure I could go on, and on, and on but there wouldn't be much since in my blog if I just came out and said everything at once. So, i'm going to do my best and space out everything on a possible daily basis. See you tomorrow,
A.